Waiting is the worst. You’ve submitted your early applications and now you are logging onto your portals, refreshing social media, playing out multiple scenarios in your head. When your decisions finally come in, you may be elated or disappointed or maybe even ambivalent. Here are some tips for students and parents to stay grounded during the decision era.
Stay Busy.
Keep up with your schoolwork and extracurriculars. If it eases your stress to work on your regular decision supplements, do it. If you prefer to take a break from applications until your early decisions come in, that’s fine too. You will have a couple of weeks to write some supplements. You will get it done.
If you are admitted early to your first-choice school:
Congratulations! That’s amazing. Celebrate! If you start doubting yourself, wondering if should have applied to a different school or not applied early or, or, or . . . breathe. It’s natural to have doubts and wonder about what could have been. Trust that you made a sound decision and enjoy your success. Early Decision acceptances are binding (except under very specific extenuating circumstances). Pay your deposit and withdraw any other applications you have submitted. There’s another student out there waiting anxiously for an offer.
If you get deferred from your first-choice school:
Take your time to feel all the feelings—disappointment, rage, whatever it may be. A deferral isn’t a rejection, so you still have a shot. Go back to your list of schools and talk to a trusted advisor about your options. Do you want to apply ED2 to your second choice? Maybe add some targets or safeties to your list to give you extra confidence?
If you get rejected from your first-choice school:
It wasn’t meant to be. I know it’s easy for me to say that and you will feel a range of emotions, but you don’t want to attend a school that isn’t eager to have you. Go back to your list and figure out your next moves. You will wind up somewhere awesome.
Handling Emotions.
Parents, when your kid tells you how anxious they are, let them know you understand and are there to support them through this whole journey. Validate the heck out of their feelings. Be their rock. Remember, it’s not your job to keep your kids from experiencing disappointment. A deferral or rejection is an opportunity for your kid to flex their resilience muscles and grow even stronger.
